Cultural Confusions

Many of the mannerisms and approaches that exist amongst the Japanese people are the exact ways of thinking that I had been reprimanded for using as a child. One of my Japanese/English teachers gave me three books translated into both Japanese and English on different cultural taboos and cultural norms that exist not only in Japan but throughout the world. These books clarify some of many misunderstandings that people have when traveling abroad. My favorite out of the three books is the one titled, “The Inscrutable Japanese”. This book juxtaposes American culture and Japanese culture, focusing largely on social behaviors. The beginning of the book opens with the subheading “Why won’t Japanese look me in the eye?” This segment talks about how direct eye contact is rude and can be seen as trying to challenge or intimidate another person. Children are scolded by the parent if looking directly at them, and are taught to keep their heads down when being reprimanded. Conversely, in America and Canada, a child will be reprimanded by their parent if not making eye contact.

“If an American child looks down when scolded, the parent will say, “Look at me when I’m talking to you!”

This part made me laugh out loud, and I actually had to leave the staff room when I read it to avoid making a scene. When I read that quote, I could see my dad’s eyes looking down at me, flashing with rage. Of course now, there is no more rage in those eyes, and he’s not the one looking down anymore.

One thing that really makes me feel at home in Japan is Japanese peoples approach to saying yes or no. I’ve always been told to be very straightforward when asking for something and not to be passive when asking for help. But this approach is the exact opposite that most Japanese take. Of course take these observations as a grain of salt, but many Japanese will use indirect expressions such as, “maybe” or “perhaps” in order to avoid sounding too harsh, and creating confrontation with others. There are so many cultural differences like this that exist, which many foreigners, including myself, often misinterpret. What I love is that as I read these things and as I live in a place where even the books are “backwards”, I begin to question and understand the culture that I’m from. I often forget that Canada does have more defining herself then just maple syrup, hockey, and or beloved Tim Horton’s.